


Midlife Crisis

by trashofalltrades



Category: Batfamily - Fandom, Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Definite Silliness, Gen, Semi-crackfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-18 08:47:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16991811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashofalltrades/pseuds/trashofalltrades
Summary: You've heard of Crisis on Infinite Earths. You've heard of Final Crisis. Now get ready for Batman: Midlife Crisis, in which Bruce realizes he is old.





	Midlife Crisis

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to ChimaeraKitten for beta'ing, checking for batman accuracy, and indulging me in this ridiculous idea

Bruce sat at the control panel, his head in his hands. “Damian’s right, I’m old,” he grumbled. “Is this what a midlife crisis feels like? should I go buy a boat?”

“Master Bruce,” Alfred said with a sigh, “You already have a boat.”

“I know but isn’t that what you’re supposed to do? Burn a bunch of money on something ridiculous?”

Alfred simply stared at him, shaking his head before turning around and setting the tray back on the table.

“I just need a change, Alfred.”

Alfred  turned around, starring at Bruce with thinly veiled horror. “I should hope you’re not planning on adopting another child?”

He rolled his eyes. “No, I’m not. Never mind, I’m fine.”

Alfred walked up to him, laying a hand on his shoulder. “I was almost forty once too, you know.”

“Did you buy a boat?”

He chuckled. “No I decided to look after a young boy. You seem to have that covered, so instead may I suggest taking the day off and doing something “fun” for once?”

Bruce opened his mouth to argue and Alfred added, “I believe I can manage things here for a few hours. You and Master Damian need to get out of the house.”

Bruce’s eyes narrowed as he weighed the options. He’d been meaning to spend more time with Damian anyway. Damian would hate it, but it would be good for him.

“All right,” he eventually said. “But just for a bit.”

Alfred smiled. “Very good. Now get out of here,” he said, shooing him back upstairs. “I’m sure Master Damian will have plenty of ideas for youthful antics to make you feel young once more.”

 

 

Bruce and Damian didn’t return till late that evening. As soon as they walked through the door Damian was off to bed, albeit under great protest, and Bruce to the Batcave to prepare for patrol.

Alfred picked up the jacket Bruce had laid over the kitchen chair, unpacking the various pockets before hanging it up.

In one of the front ones, mixed in with some cash and his sunglasses, was a photo of the two of them from a photobooth. Bruce was making silly faces while Damian looked completely unamused, his arms crossed over his chest.

He smiled. “Still young at heart, I see.”

 

 

 


End file.
